Tag Archives: disappointment

Letter to Frito-lay

16 Jan

Dear Frito-lay,

I’d first like to commend you on creating a flavored tortilla snack – “Doritos” – that are ingeniously appetizing. When I was a child, Doritos were always my snack of preference. So much so, my parents could always entice me into good behavior with the promise of a bag of Doritos.

With that being said, I’m sorry to have to unveil to you and to myself, that I have not enjoyed a bag of Doritos for quite a few some years now. But, within these same years that I’ve been neglected a bag of Doritos, I have had the displeasure of purchasing for .75 cents several plastic bags enclosed with Dorito-scented air. It seems that your company is no longer actually manufacturing bags filled with chips, but have taken on, what I must only assume is some sick joke, to be content with merely rubbing a chip on the inside of the bag. I am myself a pretty skilled novice jokster as well, so I am writing to you today to suggest some fresh ideas to help enhance the chicanery that you fine people of Frito-lay have been attempting.

  • Have little kids color triangular pieces of paper orange and stuff your bags with those instead. Market as “Healthy snacks”
  • Fill your bags with strings and confetti
  • Sell Dorito chips bagged individually for .50 cents a piece, call them “Doritos for the weight-watchers”
  • Sell mini-Doritos in the same bag and call them “Dorit-itos
  • Stop selling Doritos altogether

Just in case you swell people at Frito-lay are having doubts, I am being facetious. Please, get it together.

Signed,
Disappointed

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It’s always fun to find that the one thing you’ve been looking forward to is a disappointment.

10 Jan

Like today I had a catastrophy of a day. The only thing that got me through the day with a full head of hair was the thought that when I get home I could continue to work on my brand new giraffe of a blog. I get home all giddy with techo-joy and of course the universe would decide to poke fun at me by cutting off the internet. Now here I type next to my at the moment useless laptop on my 2 inch screen of a 2g iphone. Yes people, iPhone 2g’s still exist, and I have one, I like to refer to myself as an iPhone veteran.

. This
This is beside the point.

I have been coming up with topic ideas as easily as the government spends money (did I say that?). Heh heh Watch out world Kathryn’s blogging again, and this time she’s keeping up with it… As soon as her dad pays the internet bill.